i know ive said this before, and to me…. this is the pits. when you have friends that surprisingly enough… why cant i conetrate on the writing of this blog? oh yeah, im somewhat overly drunk, so much so that over at davids house, i fucking passedo ut on the floor, for a good ten or fifteen minutes, visiosly ate around two peicese of chicken to fill my apptite, threw up twice, and then tried to beat some one at halo 3…. to say the least, im not that sucsessfull when it comes to gaming or flirting. in fact, not to bag on myself… but my arms hurting a hell of a lot more since i began typing up this thing. what the hells the matter with me?
to be perfectly honest with you all, mr. plan out my revenge scheme over a period of years, pretty much scared the bejesus out of me while simultaneosly trying to get my self confedence going. way to go and bright idea mr. dude. may you go far in the mattters of self perpetuating the idealistic self.
to begin my random freak out session, which i do feel was messecary, or maybe it wasnt. my drunk mind is still trying to fit the peices together. he began about telling me a true story, which i will not relate, because i will not tell a lie, and because my mind is obviosly too wasted to try and lie at the moment. needless to say, i take too long to get to the point. i passed out on the floor… which is an interesting story in itself. being one of loud mouthed virue when ever im a bit over annoyed with myself, i predomintly flicked mike in the back of the head. who mike is, and what his relation to me is, i will never tell… mainly to save the face of that particular friend. after he made a crack about megans law andp utting me in it. which too my disliking, proceeded to do the afore mentioned flicking of the back of the head.
when we got to the house, i was over eager to get the drinking punishment out of the way. and much to my surprise… or unsurprise i decided to drink up and eat a peice of bread till i threw up. that was a punishment decided by mr. revenge me not. or regret ever typing this.. who ever that was. i was well innebriated within a good hour to two hours and proceeded to throw up again… and again… and spome what of a third time. for somereason, barfing up liqour is a pretty good sign of my being pretty damned drunk. lets see what else i can remember. oh yeah… the arguments…
then came the process of me shouting out practicly, every single thought that came to mind, from midgets tap dancing in glow in the dark sandels to something even more slightly disturbing.
then fact that i mistakenly said penis coloda… yes… read it again if you want. it wont change that fact.
penis colada. laugh it up while you can. it only gets worse… or funnier depending on which side of the experience you were on. mind you, this was around twi hours into the venture. there were questions about my sexuality, which btw, im straight, i have seen a womans…parts, and i am still a virgin. i have not had sex… and thats all im willing to point out. there were questions about a dream i had a while back, and questions about norwalk, and also questionability about my skills as a gamer. needless to say after the fourth kill of my oppenent, i proceeded to commit suicide and run towards my oppenet drunkenly while he happily decided to frag my ass. over and over and over and over… repeat that sixteen more times and there youll have my only gaming experience. laughable…aint it?
now youll have to understand that these events are out of order for a reason. that i cant really remember the order they happened in, and that my drunken stupor will add questionability to whether or not these events actualy happened. to your surprise and mine… yes… yes they did.
and each time after the throwing up outside on the front yard, which took around thirty seconds each, i proceeded to knock the crap out of both the punching bag and the punching bob. which btw, looks almost like a pissed off, over roided mr. rogers. “do ya want ta be my neighbor?” no. at this point in time, no i do not want to be your neighbor. “sir touch kids a lot.”
on that point, i was on the excorcise machine for the next ten minuts while i proceeded to argue pointlessly about what and why certain things happened. this is the fun part as sean will tell you.
then i passed out.
no really, i did, first i thought i was tired, then i leaned a little to the right, more to the right, then up to the middle again, then to the left, little more to the left, then off the machine i went, rock hard, passedo ut onto the floor. mind you, the lights were out, and someone was home. though they forgot to lock the door and someone robber the place of all sensability. but they did turn on the lights afterwards. there name?
mr. b vitamen. yep. i have had two or six different drinks. they are. conyack, vodka, conyack and vodka, conyack, vodka and cranberry concentrate. water, bread. (why that counts as a concentrate ill never know.) bread and water, cranbery concentrate and vodka with no tastable vodka in it. craberry concentrate and heavy vodka and concentrate with very tastable visual result, in my throwing up a third time. and quite possibly more embarrasingly enough …they got me on the phone.
you can tell at this point in the blog i have VERY, VERY good friends right? good thing they didnt have me call up sarah… or else shit wouldve hit the fan. instead…. they called brain up to help wake me my ass up. then… you laugh now.. as well as i… but it gets better. ha! lol.
they had me talk to brian…yep. loads of fun there. lol… not so much. sad faces all around.
hold on… need to check on something (five to ten minutes later)alll righty then, my relaible readers… cause thats what your are. shall we continue? yes… we shall.
where was i? oh yeah, then timing and perceptions of the overly drunk. me. lol. well, what can i say? damned if i do, damned if i dont right.? fivem inutes later and being teabagged with a bag of tomatoes… hopefully. and attempting to sock said bag of tomoatoes… hopefully. they proceeded to hold each of my arms and carry me out of the house… which was never succefull. they got tired and ifelt to the cold sting of time and tile on my face. i was zombie like, moaning and groaing till my hearts content of the wonder twins porwer activating. form of… a bucket of water… form of… a polar bear? who knows now a days.
other then the slightly disturbing fact that both me and his brother are walking the same path. overly angery and slightly disturbing the wolrd in our own unique ways. id say me and the bro are consiquently like luke a darth vader. father and son… only not… father and son. nor will we rule the universe together. like i said, im a pit wasted… or in the worlds of the almightly sean… fucked up. or emt.. or esl. or subcaptioned. so now you can.. if your deaf or hard of hear, read everythingthing im saying in the form of japanese subtitles.
what else happened? nothing that i CAN remember. anything thath appened tonight, i wrote down. anything that might be remembered tonight… ill write down later. till then my little bros and hoes. the farmer type. “work for my money billy- joe- tyson!” “yes mr. cornhedge!”
i bid you… a do wop. a do wop…. boop ity boop do wop. fiftyies style bitches! lol. peace and out!