i dont really know whats going on in my mind, just when i think everythings smooth sailing, i hit a wave of doubt and uncertainty. although this really has nothing to do with the fact that all my life i was pushed from one situation to another like a checkerpeice. but through each of these experiences ive learned that to calm one heart and firey passions, instead of trying to block out thoses memories, or change the image of a loved one from one thing to another, that i should accept those feelings and let them die out on there own, and relish the time with the loved one and let it play itself out until naother thought pops into my head.
though i must admit its been a tad bit trying on the concience to say the least. ive been doing some thinking on the whole of things at my current point in life. i know im signed up with a temp agency, so that pretty much takes care of the job part of things. im still single, wich doesnt really bother me as much as it used to, i still need to get my drivers license and buy my first house…. or at least find a place where the rent is cheap. i also need to help get avatars united off the ground and into the air with the stories and such. my feelings for kimberlee have pretty much subsided and everythings returned to nomarlcy for me anyways. ive dealt with my feelings for sarah, and weve both agreed it would be better off if we stayed friends. and now those are getting back nto place. im still a virgin, no surpise there.
as for the whole of the family matter, taris doing fine, she has her moment where i want to smack her one, but everythings been a little rocky from time to time. my relationship with my step dad scott has improved a little bit as well as my dad. i havent talked to any of my cousins in a while but im trying to change that.
i guess all in allthings are going pretty well for me. im making new friends gradualy and im finding that even if i dont really belong in any one group of friends, i know that i have friends that i cherish to death, and thats saying alot right there.