Sick and Hating It

Haven’t been able to get words past my brain on onto paper because my head is so blocked from a summer cold, one I got because I had to walk through a nice down pour of last week. The people at the Social Services Office know that I don’t drive, and that I have to use public transportation, but they still call me bad parent if I cancel an appointment do to bad weather. I have to ask though what does keeping myself healthy have to do with my parenting skills? They are always preaching in my classes that you can’t take care of your child unless you take care of yourself first. So when I go to take care of myself I get called a bad parent, fuck CPS, fuck the System, and fuck my Social Worker and her stupid following the rules crap.

What the fuck do they want from me anyway? I do what they tell me to do from my classes and I’m wrong, I do what the Social worker tells me to do, and some how I’m wrong again. I’m a parent for fuck sake, not a mind reader, fortune teller, or even a god. I mess up so sue me, I’m not perfect, no one is, and Children don’t come with a manual for crying out loud. If they did pop out with a book that said “Your Child and How to Raise Him/Her” then things would be easier. However the magic stops at the child growing inside of you, its no like he/she is in your womb writing about how to raise it, what to expect and how to deal with it.

The other thing, ALL KIDS ARE DIFFERENT, that means not all the taught curriculum CPS gives is not going to work for all kids. I even had a teacher tell me to use different methods as long as your child comes out healthy, then it might have worked. However my methods didn’t work because they want to listen to a drunken asshole who screamed child abuse was happening. Now they have it in their minds that I can’t protect my child or am unwilling to protect my child. The only thing I can’t protect is myself from them, I can’t trust them to say or do anything straight. I can’t even trust them to keep my rights as a parent and citizen of the USA in sight.

Lets face it, CPS is a semi useful organization only when it’s saving the real victims. However they are not always saving the real victims, some children that are victims are still slipping through the cracks, such as the ones that have parents that can calm its part of their religion. Does that really work? I don’t know and it makes me shiver to believe that it might be so. We all would like to believe that CPS is doing the right thing at all times but they are not, and when we open our eyes to see the truth we realize we just got fucked.

A very smart woman I know gave me a list of books these are books that helped her while she’s been stuck under the CPS thumb, they take about all kinds of things. I feel that anyone in the CPS system should have this information, because your worker will not volunteer information and unless you know the questions to ask, or where to look. You might not find it yourself. So as follows:

  1. The Encyclopedia of Child Abuse, Second Edition
  2. Children, Young Adults, and the Law A Dictionary
  3. The Tender Years Toward Developmentally
  4. Sensitive Child Welfare Service for Very Young Children
  5. Handbook for Child Protection Practice
  6. Child Welfare: Examining the Policy Frame Work
  7. Child Welfare: Current Dilemmas Future Directions
  8. Outcomes of Child Welfare Service Under Permanency Planning
  9. Child Abuse and Neglect: A look at the states
  10. Handbook of Social Worker Practice with Vulnerable and Resilient Populations

I have been told that you can find these books in your local library for check out. So that book a notebook and pen should help fuel your ability to get the right things done to help you and your child.I know some of you are worried that his information can fall into the hands of a child abuser, let me tell you even if it does. These books are not going to help them remove the marks from the child, or even erase what is already set in motion. Even if they do read these books, the facts that have been documented will have already seen.

Well that’s it for now, because even though I’m sick, I have to be a good parent and go to another CPS appointed appointment.

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