I’m feeling a bit complacent.

Blah mothah fuckahs! lmao. Yeah… No. Anyways, I just wanted to check with you all to let you know a few things. What they are, or what order they’ll appear in, I have no idea. But its gonna be a fun as fuck ride. First off, for the uninitiated, this is going on Facebook. My Facebook. Where undoubtedly, there will be a few moans and groans over one thing or another, so I’m not completely worried about that.

The second being, that a former boss of mine, Nick Millar, I’m not gonna use his ‘real’ last name, god knows I’ve struck a nerve on that thing, anyways, I’ve been thinking about Nick for a while. Not in the “Oh, let’s bury the hatchet” kinda way, nor in the “Fuck this guys online shit up” kinda way either. I can’t explain it in a way that would make sense, but for some reason, he’s on my mind, which in most cases, isn’t really a place I want him to be. Mental image or not. 

I guess I’m feeling kinda complacent, like everythings just going back to a slow simmering normal. I hate the feeling, that thing about Humans being wandering nomads, going out into the world, trying to prove themselves in one way or another. In other words, I’m missing out on life. 

I know, I know. I need to get off the launch pad so to speek and just get out into the world and see what’s out there right? That would be the ideal thing for me. Living at home, while it does boast its advantages, can be a fucking pain at times. Every family fights, this is nothing new. It grates on nerves, cause a slowly growing divide in the ranks, and at times, we wind up on Cops. Not our family personally. Just those in Kentucky and other such places of wise red neck wizardry. 

But to be honest, I DO need to get off my lazy ass and go explore the world for a bit on my own, hell, I’ve got a camera, a bike, a netbook, and a backpack and a sleeping bag! Why the hell shouldn’t I go out there and strike out on my own for a while? It would definitely be somehting very interesting for me to do.

Among those things, the idea of “Hobo City” has once again been haunting my mind like the lyrics to “Friday” or that one freaky chick awkwardly dancing. Yeah something like that. 

I don’t know why the thought hasn’t just vanished away, maybe it’s supposed to stick around and haunt me till I do something about it. Hobo City, a place for the homeless in any state to make tracks to. I don’t know why this idea has stuck around for so long, trying to loiter its way into my side vision like some psychotic teen… But, its there none the less.

The idea came up during a chat on the phone with a teacher. He asked what I had planned for the next ten years, and me not really taking him seriously, just bullshitted a little bit. I told him I was going to create Hobo City, a place for any and all homeless to feel like they’ve got a place to stay, to make their own way in life. There’d be places for them to get checked up, no drugs or alchohol to get everyone clean and sobered up, Counsolers to help those with different mental configurations or DFC’s, I’m not using Mental Disability anymore, seems too… I dunno, disrespectful to our very genetic code.

As I was saying, it’d have places for those with DFC’s to get the help they’d need to have some way of coping with what they’ve got going on mentally. I’ve always fashioned myself a kind of useless visionary when it came to these kinds of things. I’ll talk about them for a while, and then it would just fade away.

But if you really think about it, Hobo City would really be helpful in taking care of the homeless situation in most cities. I don’t know how serious I’m taking myself on this point, or even if I want to take a stab at it. As I was reading The Walking Dead comic, the volume where Rick and company get invited to a community that thrives essentially on the efforts of those who dwell within its protective walls, it really did get me thinking about the possibility that maybe, with some help, I could get the ball at least rolling a few meters.

If you think about it, a city built for homeless, by homeless, would be an interesting thing to try to make a reality. At first, the logic of it seemed a bit mind boggling. How would I spread the word? How would I even go about getting things together? What about space requirements or even food and water? 

Then I thought about all the practically abandoned Ghost Towns or Ghost Hoods (Places where things are just fuckin dead… Not literally). But I didn’t want to get all corporate about this. Still mulling things over. The possibility is pretty exciting though. 

Next up is the writing! Yay me. Or the jobs, or whatever I decide to talk about, you guys know the procedure by now if you kept up with my blog for a long time. At the moment, I’m noticing a lul in my writing pace. Which I really don’t like! Grrr to that. There’s not much I can do about it. I’m not really the kind of guy to just kick start my mind to full steam ahead unless I actually feel like it. And lately though, it’s only getting to around half power.

Just enough to care, not enough to do much about it. Fuuuuuuuuck.

Don’t get me wrong though, I absolutely love writing, both the blog novella, the thread stories (Gory lil bastards those are), and the Dorikame Saga, which admittedly, I’ve kinda let slip from my “Oh shit, I need to get cracking” radar. But Blake’s taking care of that as far as I can tell, the talking between us isn’t really work related that much anymore, its more or less just regular chatter, which is good. 

And then there’s Modern Warfare 3 on the Wii. Yes, I’m going to unleash my own particular brand of whathefuckness on this thing. Because even though I’m slowly getting the hang of it, I’m still getting my ass handed to me on a regular basis. I mean, FOR GODS SHINING CRAP TEARS! Ine game I played online my kill/death ratio was horrid!

11/53

Think about that, for every one kill I had, I was slaughtered nearly five times. And to top it off, post game chatter got me mocked by a fourteen year old girl who pretty much told me her period spills more in game blood than I do. and that’s saying alot since she pretty much stalked my ass through out the whole fucking match! It’s like, she had spawn point ESP or something! Sniped at a tunnel, grenaded by the door, arrow to the knee by the fucking tree! EVERY SINGLE TIME! 

Dont get me wrong, mw3 is an awesome achievment for game design on the Wii. BUT I LOVE IT MORE ON THE 360! Where i played it almost constantly, at Nick’s house, when he was my boss. Before he got all pissy on me.  Well, we got pissy on each other. We had a textgument, but that’s neither here nor there anymore, and it’s pretty much old news by the sound of it.

God damn him he was a douche bag in every sense of the word. But he was also pretty much the closest friend I could physically see I’ve had in a long time. But shit ends when it needs to end, and this was no different. I mean, the guy trusted me with his secrets, I’m not sure how secret those secrets are, but regardless, I’m not telling you his secrets. 

One thing I really do admire him for is his journals. Dude has a ton of the lil buggers. never looked in them, wanted to sooo fucking badly, but, I didn’t really feel like it was my place to peek inside the mind of someones innermost thoughts. I don’t know why he left them out in the open on occasion though, maybe it was a test of my trustworthiness, or maybe he really just wanted to screw with my mind. I’ll never know, and for the record, I dont think I’ll ever want to know.

Hrm… at the moment its 2:12 in the morning. I don’t really write this early in  the morning. nose hair, itches like crazy, but not anymore. I need longer arms. I want something. I forget…. and there’s the first yawn.

One thing I haven’t done in a while is watch the sun rise. I’ve done it maybe once or twice in my life, stayed up and slowly watched the morning rays peer over the mountain tops. But those instances are few and far between. It’s weird being an adult, I feel like im still seventeen, and then I repeat my age to myself as a reminder of how far from those days I am.

sometimes its a good feeling that im at this point in my life, other times, it feels like a screwed up somewhere along the line. im not saying this to make you all think im a dick or anything! far from it! ive suddenly decided to use exclamation points! im thinking itll make this seem a bit more interesting if i changed things up a bit! im not sure why!

i miss the gavin side of the family! sure at times… most of the time, i was an awkwardly silent antisocial weird nephew or cousin that didnt really have much to say! but… fuck the points. but for the most part, its been a while since ive seen them. it really has, im just guess that at this point im just popping out any old thought until i decide to stop writing. and ive reached that point. till next time!

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